Yeah, that was tough. Running short of your budget a few days before payday plus I have to pay a long list of debts which include myself. That is the hardest part of being broke. When you are indebted to yourself. Sabi nga ni John (my former officemate), pinakamahirap utangan ang sarili mo. Kasi mahirap singilin.
It was Thursday morning when I decided not to go to work because I am so stressed out. I spent my office hours trying to finish my novel since I don't have anything to do YET (the worse is yet to come). After a few days of trying to squeeze out something from my brain to finally put an end to the undying saga of Aki and Sachiko, I finally gave up. I never should try ending a novel just because it had to end on the tenth chapter. Otherwise, it'll end up all cramped up. Iyong tipong para lang malagyan ng ending. So I opted to make a book 2. Of course, that would mean 10 whole new chapters but then it will give me room to polish the story and make things flow smoothly. Iyong nga lang, I have to wait for a few more months before I can submit the story because when a novel comes with a book 2, you should pass both books at the same time. Sigurista ang publisher. Para raw siguradong may book 2 nga.
Well, anyway, so just as when I was on my back staring at the ceiling and trying to concentrate on solving my financial woes, sabi ko kay Grace...wala ba kaming incentive? Sana naman meron. Kahit isang libo lang masaya na ako! That was a very innocent desire. Totoo...kahit isang libo lang masaya na ako. It would somehow lighten my load.
A few hours later, Mocs texted me to share some good news. May incentive na daw. And guess what? It was a couple of bucks more than I expected. Grabe...I could really jump for joy kung hindi lang ako lubhang tinatamad. Kandahirap akong mag-aral ng Nihongo para lang matapos na agad iyong book 2 ng nobela ko para sana magkadatung. Then all of a sudden news like this one would come like a knight in shining armor. Para akong nabunutan ng tinik. Finally, I could now pay myself.
Pero may katas naman ang incentive ko. I bought a new sandals. Iyong medyo mas mababang takong kaysa sa araw-araw kong ginagamit. Lately, I've been tired of wearing that 2 1/2 inch heels while walking along Araneta Avenue going to work everyday. At least now, I have some spare to rest my sored feet. Plus, I was able to by Bob Ong's Bakit Baligtad Magbasa ng Libro ang mga Pilipino. I've been dying to complete my collection of all of his books. I've read Bakit Baligtad back in college pa ata. But I wasn't able to finish it. Now is the time for me to recollect the reasons why I love that book.
And I'm off towards home on Sunday to pay our telephone bill and give my lola a few bucks for her medicines. It wasn't enough I know but it will help. I've been planning to give my Tita a microwave oven and buy myself a DVD player at home. Sana I could do that eventually. I've been saving for that. Plus, I'm also saving up for my graduate studies. I'm planning to take up a master's degree some time this year. I 'm working for that. Sana matuloy.
Sana rin makarami ako ng novel. I really would love to pursue writing as a career. Well...my hopes are high. I'm keeping my fingers crossed, my prayers consistent and my faith stronger that I would soon have these things in my mind.